Disclosure: I received a free copy of this book to review. Opinions shared are mine.

So, I freely admit that I was passionate about reading this book mostly because I really wanted to read This Is Where It Ends, but I don’t own that book.  I did have a copy of Before I Let Go, so….that was a simple decision.  After finishing the book in 2 days, let me sum up my reading experience in 3 words.

Huh?

Whaaa???? 

Wait…..

Scratching my head here.  It feels so inadequate to tell you that this book was bizarre (imagine wide-open-eyes here), but that’s truly the best single word that describes the story.  I genuinely hope that there was some huge, deeper meaning in this book that I completely missed — and if so, please enlighten me.  I will gladly revisit my review. It’s very likely that there are a few new creases on my forehead just from attempting to discern the relevant parts of this book.  Let me try, just for you.

First, Before I Let Go dealt a heavy hand with the whole bipolar disorder thing.  Kyra’s death was announced first thing in chapter one, so I don’t feel like I’m giving away spoilers to reveal that. However, the author’s flashbacks had Kyra continually saying that she’s so much more than her illness.  Unfortunately, the constant subject of her bipolar disorder seemed to negate that sentiment.  It was a wild cycle that never really seemed to go anywhere.  Mental illness is a relevant subject for today’s reader.  However, it didn’t seem authentic in this story.

While I appreciate that there are ever-new acronyms being developed for every possible orientation, it doesn’t always have to get mentioned in the books.  The effort was very ineffectual in Before I Let Go. It felt forced and so unnecessary.

Let me also point out that Lost Creek, Alaska is just creepy.  In a really bad way, too. Not in a cool-looking haunted house kind of way.   More like, the people in Lost were descended from Children of the Corn or something.  Shuddering here with the weirdness.  Not to mention, what is up with the parents in Lost?!  Were there no parenting classes or, really, any normal adult in this town?!

Now, if this all came together in cohesive measure, I might have enjoyed it.  Unfortunately, Before I Let Go was just an awkward mashup of any YA book ever.  It’s rare for me to say this, but I have a hard time rating this book higher than 1/5 stars.   I wish there was maybe a 1.5? Because I feel guilty for 1 star but UGH. Just really didn’t like this book.

Thanks to Netgalley for providing me with this book.